Still On Your Side
by Mac-alicious
Summary: I'm glad you're still on my side Hermione.Ive always been on your side Harry. [oneshotHHr friendship] [DH spoilers in AN and minor in story]


**A/N: **This is a small one shot I wrote after DH. It addresses the section where Ron…now I'm assuming you've all read DH, if not spoilers ahead here….leaves Harry and Hermione. This basically addresses a closer HHr friendship, not romance. And it completely voids all romantic issues in the last half of the book, at least in this AU universe thing that I got going on here. Anyway, enjoy. R&R. Thanks! –Mac

**Disclaimer: **I don't own, if I did Ginny would have evaporated into to thin air after her part in book one, and Ron would have died a painful death somewhere in the series…not really but they would not have been love interests for Harry or Hermione.

**Still On Your Side**

They didn't talk about his absence much, but they both felt it. His walking out had hurt them both, though in different ways it seemed. So while the wound was still fresh, they said and did nothing that might make it larger. Yet as Hermione cried herself to sleep each night and Harry lay awake—his heart breaking—listening to her quiet sobs, it was a conversation that needed to be had. And eventually it was.

The moment that set it into motion was when Harry accidentally let his name slip out. They had gone so long without bringing him up, that his name had become unspokenly forbidden. As soon as it left his lips, Hermione's eyes widened in surprise and her chest hitched forward in a sob. Harry instantly felt guilty, but at the same time he was angry at _him_ once again. This was the first time Hermione had let Harry see her cry over this situation since that first night. Seeing the pain _he_ had caused her, renewed Harry's ill feelings toward him.

Harry hated seeing Hermione hurt, but at the same he felt incredibly uncomfortable. He didn't know how to handle tears. Through he knew he couldn't just leaver her there, not again. Harry stood from his chair and moved over to where Hermione was hunched over in her own. Harry wrapped his arms around Hermione's shaking shoulders and pulled her against him. She tensed at first as she came in contact with his chest, but eventually relaxed against him. Neither were aware of how long they had stayed like that before the tears dried up.

Hermione slowly pulled away, "I'm sorry Harry. Oh, I cried all over you."

"I should be the one apologizing. I never should have said..." Harry caught himself. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's not your fault." Hermione replied casually, as she began to stack up the things she had been using. "You're not the one who left."

Harry was surprised for a few reasons. For one, that she had said anything on the matter at all. They hadn't talked about him, mentioned him at all, and here she was starting down a road they had refused to acknowledge. And another, the tone she had used sounded so cold, as if she didn't care at all. It confused him that she could burst into tears over _his_ name and then be so nonchalant about the situation.

Harry carefully chose his next words, "He really hurt you didn't he?"

"Well of course he hurt me." Hermione said matter-of-factly, turning to Harry with a very Hermione-esque expression. An expression that said he may have asked the stupidest question she had ever heard. "He hurt both of us. He abandoned us in a time of great need."

"That's not quite what I meant." Harry started. He paused a moment before continuing, "It must have hurt you more, you love him."

Hermione sighed, "I don't love Ron, not like that anyway."

"But…"

"I don't love Ron anymore than you love Ginny." Hermione cut him off.

Harry looked shocked for a moment, before Hermione raised an eyebrow and it faded away. He lowered his head a second. He conceded.

Hermione spoke softly, "I know how you feel. You care, you care a lot, but it's not quite at that level…"

"…yet." Harry added.

Hermione frowned and let out a small short laugh, "Well, maybe there's a chance for you and Ginny. If there was any chance of me loving Ron, what he did ruined it."

"I don't understand." Harry responded.

"I fancied Ron; of course I did, at one point. It didn't stick, Harry. Ron is my best friend, as are you, but it ends there. For me at least it ends there. Ron, on the other hand, feels more I believe. I fear I've led him on a bit. I care about him, and it may have had the potential to grow, but when he left…I just don't know how I'll ever forgive him." Hermione explained. "You need him, you needed his help. We were meant to do this together and he just walked away."

"This is…about me?"

"It's always about you Harry." Hermione smiled faintly.

"But the crying…just now…and at night?"

Hermione faltered, "And I thought I was so secretive about that. I always thought you were asleep." She sighed and looked up at Harry. "I was upset over Ron, to be reminded of how he left just now hurt. But the other times…it's so much more than just him. He's leaving triggered all the emotions in me to go haywire and spill out all over the place. Everything I've held in: about my parents, about the war, about him, about you, about everything. I just kept thinking '_what is this world coming to?'_ If he can walk out on his closest friends, just imagine…but I couldn't. I couldn't imagine; it hurt too much."

Harry nodded, "It seems all we're capable of is finding more darkness."

"I was just glad you're still with me." Hermione replied. "If I didn't have someone I would completely break."

"You're glad?" Harry exclaimed incredulously. "My strength is with you and Ron, always has been. I need you to survive, if it wasn't for the two of you, I would have been done for long ago."

"That's why I was so angry at Ron for leaving." Hermione stated. "You need him more than I do."

Harry froze as he realized what he had said. Since Ron had left, he had denied needing him. He told himself Hermione was enough and that was true. He had also told himself, though, that he didn't need Ron because he never had. He needed both his best friends, but he could handle it as long as he had someone.

Hermione nodded, she knew Harry had come to an understanding. She started to move away, but Harry's voice stopped her. She turned back to look at him, giving him her full attention.

"I'm glad you're still on my side Hermione." Harry said quietly.

Hermione smiled. "I've always been on your side Harry. And I'll always be by your side. I could never leave you."

Harry returned her smile, "Good because I couldn't go on without you."

Hermione took a couple steps toward Harry. When she stood right in front of him, she wrapped her arms around him. He hugged her back, his arms encircling her waist.

"Let's never find out if that's true." Hermione whispered.


End file.
